Wednesday, December 28, 2011

December 28 Five Memories


Prompt 28:

Five Things

Take today to jot down five memories that you would like to never forget about 2011. 


1. February 4th the birth of my grandson Eli. A traumatic, pre-mature birth wrapped with an ambulance ride to St. Vincents. But the day I held him was so wonderful. I had never held any body that small before, he was so fragile and tiny, peering up at me with Peters eyes. I fell in love instantly.


2. Celebrating Malachi's birthday in April. A one year old, so adorable and lovely! 


3. Getting Andy graduated from College, a collective sigh, no more college tuition payments, I say selfishly. But the thrill of him getting a degree in something that he loves and is excited about does my heart good.


4. Being sick, sick, sick and having to delay our trip to Alaska for one stinking day. But the trip to Alaska was spectacular. Being there, with the family and friends and Ambo's wedding! Great fun.


5. Since its the last one I will lump sever things into one number. The exciting news that we are going to have yet another grand baby. Our trip to Sacramento, Ca. to be with our friends and just enjoy being us and being together. 


I celebrate the little things and like to remember them too. I remember every time the family gets together, weather it is building a fence, celebrating a birthday, or playing in the inflatable pool or just sitting and visiting. I remember the holidays, Christmas, New Year and 4th of July at Grama Keysers house. I remember all the little trips we take trying to be apart of our families lives. Life is memorable and good.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

December 27 Everything is going to be Ok in 2012


Everything Is Going to Be OK

What is one thing, a sign if you will, that has shown you that things will be just fine in 2012?

Every year is the year that we are given. I believe that we are to make the most of what we are given. So I rest assured everyday that everything is going to be OK.

Sometimes we think about the bad things that might happen to us, and will we be OK? But do we ever think about the good things that happen to us that could radically change our lives and make them difficult or different. Look at my kids, having another baby, quickly after having two others, it is a blessing, a joy and a gift from God. They are going to be just fine, they are going to make adjustments and more sacrifices but they are going to nurture the beautiful gift that God is giving them.

I might get more work and be busier next year. It will create a need for adjustment and creativity and sacrifice, but I will make the best of it. It will afford us things that we would not be able to have otherwise. Some see being busy as a burden and a problem but I see it as an opportunity to be financially successful, and be a blessing in someone else life.

Maybe I will be even less busy this coming year and not make as little money as I did this year. I will make the most of it, I will spend more concentrated teaching time with Edik and i will get my scrap books finished. Heck I might even start a new business.

I can't imagine my optimism leaving me for very long, it took a sabbatical a year ago, but it returned even in the midst of a very difficult transition. Heck most days I believe I can make a rainbow out of a pile of shit!

With God directing each step it will be OK!

December 26th Going Out Song

December 26th  Out Going Song

I think this song sums up what each year should be for all of Gods people. I could choose any one of a million songs that bring glory to the Father, but being his hands, feet and His heart towards others is the best I can do in the time that I have.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fuAxzEuzNGg  Click on this link to hear my song!

Love them Like Jesus  by Casting Crowns

December 25 Unconditional Love


December 25th
Who do you love unconditionally? 

I stole this from Amy because she said exactly what I would say!!


In the short time I have been a mother, I have learned something incredibly valuable from my children. I have learned what unconditional love is. There is nothing that my children could do or say to make it possible for me to stop loving them. I think there are very few relationships we have on this earth that truly hold unconditional love. Even the deep love I have for my husband, has conditions to it. Our love for one another could be broken if those conditions are not met or a commitment is broken.

With my children I can't imagine a single thing they could do to make me stop loving them. They could steal, hurt, murder and I would still love them even if I had extreme disappointment in their actions. Of course I could never imagine one of my little angels doing anything like that, but they will disappoint me from time to time and that will not affect my love for them one little bit!

Having children has given me a completely new understanding of how God's love for us works. I can understand it now! We are His children and there is nothing we can do to make him stop loving us. I never got that before. I never understood how he could love me enough to let His pride and joy die for me. I continually disappoint Him, but He still loves! That does not mean, He is never disappointed in the things I do or that there are not consequences for my actions - but He loves me just the same. It is pretty incredible to think about, and amazing how much I have learned about my own salvation through my little ones.

Friday, December 23, 2011

December 24 Try


December 24:

Try

What is one thing (activity, food, career, event, travel, etc.) that you'd like to try in 2012? Why haven't you tried it yet? What makes 2012 the year to try it?


I would love to drive a race car, in a race. But I don't think this is the year for that. I would love to drive a speed boat, maybe 2014. This year, I think I would like to start studying to be come an Aesthetician.


I think that it would be fun to know what they know and unlock some of the secrets that help our skin stay healthy and young looking. I suppose it would be self serving and feeding into my vanity, but it might be profitable as well. 


Don't hold me to it!  

December 23 Today is all you have


December 23 Today Is All You Have


Describe your perfect day, one that you've had this year or one that you'd like to have next year. What makes it perfect for you?


Getting up early say 6am, working out, while watching Designing women. After my work out trucking off to Massage envy for a Shiatsu massage for a lovely hour. While driving up I would talk (hands free) with my mom and see how she is. After I am relaxed I would head back home for a shower and to get dressed. I would not be responsible for anyone else, everyone in my life would take care of themselves and think for themselves and I would be left to only be loving and creative.


Breakfast would be eating a ham, cheese, broccoli quiche with a good cup of hot coffee, while sitting at my table in the sun, reading the Bible. The grand babies would come over and play for a few hours then I would retreat to my office.


I would sit down to a well organized room, with Lori and Tracey, all my scrap booking stuff arranged in color and chronological order. I would have all the supplies and colored paper and stickers, and my computer and printer talking to each other. I would complete my remaining books. I know reality would be that it is going to take a month of perfect days to finish this task, but it would be the perfect day to do that.


In the evening, I would dine on prime rib, with baked potatoes and an ice cold salad with ranch dressing. Brian, Lori, Bruce, Tracey, Steve and  I would go to a good movie. After the movie we would go and get a yummy chocolate dessert. We would laugh and carry on.


A variation on that day might be taking the grand babies to the zoo all day and eating at Fudrucker's and coming home and playing in the back yard, and going for a walk. But just to have those babies in my life makes everyday a perfect day!

December 22 Identify the Problem


December 22, 2011 Prompt:

Identify the Problem


Identify the problem. That is, when you’re annoyed, angered, or frustrated, ask yourself, “What exactly is the problem here?”
Today, take a few minutes to ponder that one little, nagging issue that, if solved or eliminated, would make your life better. 


I solved my issue this year. I have always operated with rather high expectation, not just for myself, but for others. I know I am suppose to be ashamed of that statement, but to be honest I am not. I think having expectations, keeps life interesting, changing and it keeps me striving for success. Having expectations towards others, was usually just what they we capable of or promised to do already. 


Having someone in my life who could not meet even basic expectations, grew to be a huge stress and it created conflict. But June 2, 2011 I gave up. There is a country song that the young lady singing about her cheating, lying boyfriend who wanted her back, she sings right out loud, "my give a damn is busted". So I had that reaction on June 2nd. I just decided I could not continue to have any expectations. I had a friend who kept telling me lower your expectations. So my give a damn busted.


So with giving up, it freed me to be myself again. I no longer had any expectations. If I thought something needed to be done, I gave an instruction and waited for execution. I no longer felt frustrated when a basic behavior was expected and in no way executed. 


There was finally relief for me and peace again in my heart and life. Lowering my exceptions has made all the difference in the world. 

December 21


December 21, 2011 Prompt:

Embrace - What guilty pleasure have you embraced this year?

I start each one of these posts perplexed as to what I should write.  I suppose I should start off naming my pleasures and then I should see if I feel any guilt with them.

I love to get my nails done, I love to sit and visit with Tammy, and chat with the other patron. I love  to see my nails transform into lovely little tips on the end of my fingers. This is a costly luxury but one that I have enjoyed for 9 and a half years. Ok after reviewing my post, I do feel guilty about this, but it has become a necessity!

Being a voyeur is another thing that I have began to enjoy. I think that Facebook is one of the best places to watch other people. Most of the time I do feel like I am just staring in through a frosted window. But I love to see what other people do, think and who they are friends with. I think its a great way to stay connected. A simple comment can lead to another and another and we are connected once again.

I simply have had the pleasure this year of not worrying every time I put something in my mouth. I use to calculate and fret and tit for tat everything I ate. I use to be obsessed with exercising and now, I eat and don't worry, I exercise and enjoy it. Probably not good for my waist line but there is a lot more peace in my heart about food and indulgences! I might have to go back to my ridged thinking again but I had a year of indulgence!
 

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

December 20 Elevator Speech


December 20, 2011 Prompt:

Elevator Speech

If you had 30-90 seconds to describe yourself. 


Hi I am Beth Keyser. I am a Realtor for a Prudential NW Properties a locally owned Real Estate Company. I specialize in residential re-sale and investment property. I have a very successful business that is based on referrals from satisfied clients. Over caring for my clients is what has made me so successful. They enjoy the specialized attention, and detail I spend with them and for them on their transactions. I find great joy in educating and helping the wonderful people I work with.


I enjoy exploring Portland and love to do short walking tours of the different neighborhoods to know it better. I enjoy getting coffee and enjoying the urban experience of Portland. 


My poodles are another enjoyable part of my life, training them and grooming them are two of my favorite things. I think they are one of the smartest breeds around.


I jump into the political arena sometimes, at the local level such as on the Citizen Rate Review Committee for our local water. It has been a good experience to understand the way local government works. I usually give the conservative voice when I share.


I love to help children at all levels, I adopted my son from Russia and I work with children at my churches AWANA program, helping them learn to play and learn about Gods. These are the things that really get me excited.


My family is important to me and I love being with them and have a good balance of my church life, family and work.

December 19th Then and Now


December 19, 2011 Prompt:

Then and Now

What was your life like a decade ago?


About a decade ago in September our country experienced the tragedy of September 11th. That has truly changed our country forever. The day was devastating and excrusiating. The fear of a childhood threatened by the Vietnam war and its possible encroaching to Alaska, always felt real and terrifying. With the vents of 9/11 and the invading of Iraq the threat of a war in my country felt so real. The sorrow I felt for all the families of the people who were killed in the bombings and such sorrow for those hurt stayed with me for half the year.


I was 39 years old, Brian was 41 years old, Peter was 15, Andy was 12 and Edik was 4 years old. 


I am really struggling to remember. I did not sell real estate. We were singles group leaders. We went to all of Peters athletic events. I stayed home with Andy and home schooled him, while running Peter to orchestra at Newberg high from Chehalem Valley Academy. 


I hung out with Kelly Hagglund and helped her clean her rooms out. I was also friends with Debbie Holton, Paula Sprunger, Sheri Smithwick and of course Carrie McNeal.


It really was an unremarkable year. Then next year was far more interesting. 

December 18th Traditions


December 18, 2011 Prompt:

Traditions

This is the time of year when families are upholding decades old traditions and working to create new ones. It doesn't matter what you celebrate (or don't) ... please share with us your December traditions: how they got started, why you continue them, and why they are special to you.


Christmas is Lefsa. Lefsa is Norwegian,it is made with flour, cream, butter and the all important ingredient, riced potatoes. My grandfather was Norwegian and his mom-ma would make he and his sibling Lefsa. Grama Dot would make it Christmas morning for him. Then my mom always made it for us Christmas morning. I make it for my family now.


Not everyone appreciates the flavor of Lefsa, those who do not have Goodman or Peterson blood in their veins are not huge fans of these flat butter soaked potato cakes, but they appear to curiously participate in our tradition for no other reason than to be apart of it.


Lefsa always reminds me of my father. There has not been a Christmas since he died that I don't shed a tear while listing to the Statlers Brother Christmas album and rolling out Lefsa with my family, wishing for nothing more than for him to still be with us. Because he loved Lefsa, the cooking of it and the eating of it. One year he even whittled a Lefsa stick, so two people could cook at once, for those high production years. His stick and the commercial stick hang side by side in my linen closet all year long, then they emerge like Santa every Christmas morning, and after breakfast is over secretly disappear for another year.




Here is how it plays out. When we first get up Brian, Andy and Edik will peal the potatoes and cube them and put them in my two largest pots to boil while we open our presents. Once we are finished with the gifts the men clean up the mess, as I start to make the Lefsa. 


The recipe is 10 pounds of potatoes, they must be put through a potatoe ricer. This takes great strength, so one of the men in the family does that. One cup of butter tossed in with the hot riced potatoes, so that it melts and runs through them like lava. A pint of cream is drizzled over all the steaming potato and butter mixture, they delicately combine. The mixing is done by hand, lightly lifting and folding the ingredients. The flour is then added. It can take up to 2 pounds of flour, gently folding together, reducing the moisture so that the small golf ball size globs will not stick to the granite counters as they are rolled thin, like tortillas. When the small balls are divided off the large dough blob in the huge stainless steel bowl, they are kneaded with more flour to make the perfect consistency as to move slightly above the floured surface and turn and flatten and expand with the unique rolling pin.


The Lefsa rolling pin is a large rolling pin, with the rolling portion being ribbed. The ribs are the perfect replica of someone gouging the rolling pin with a fork and dragging it the length of the pin. The ribs create a texture in the dough to help it not stick. I was fortunate to find such a pin in an antique store. We had no idea there was such an item for our tradition.


While cooking the family come in to hang out while I roll these thin tortilla type wonders out on the counter, lightly toss them onto one of my two electric griddles. Brian keeps an eye on them as they cook on both sides. He uses the Lefsa sticks to turn them so both sides are toasted, but not brown.


By the end of the process of rolling and cooking up to ten pounds of potatoes into lefsa the kitchen is a floury mess. The joke is to wear black pants and at some point someone puts a white flour hand print on someones butt.


Peter and Andy have the Lefsa eat off. I think 14 is the max that anyone has done, but I could be wrong, it is their secret war to determine who is the the champion. Edik still can not hold a candle to them. They put butter on them, then sprinkle cinnamon and sugar on them. Sometimes, they put butter and raspberry pie filling on them with whip cream. Everyone has their own recipe for delighting in this tasty temptation.


Its funny that Lefsa was the binding tool that brought Mark and Cheri my brother and sister-in-law together. Cheri's family has the same tradition. Its also the binding agent that brings my family all together around my big granite counter to celebrate Christs birth and our heart filled Christmas tradition.

Saturday, December 17, 2011

December 17 Appreciate


December 17, 2011 Prompt:

Appreciate

What’s the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year?

Brian. 
What an amazing man. He completed his masters degree. Promptly went out and  and got a new job. A job he enjoys and that has room for advancement. And one that provides better for his family.

The thing that I appreciate about him is that he continues to provide for our family, even as it grows. He never grumbles or complains about the money we spend and the generosity that we share. 

I think about how he has stayed so steady at his jobs and how he goes in early and stays late. He works so hard to be indispensable and to do things right and above board. He has to do hard things like fire people, he doesn't like doing this but he does it anyhow.

He has always allowed me my folly. If I want us to go on a vacation he finds a way. If I want to adopt from Russia, he finds a way. If I want to do some creative new decorative thing, he is right along side providing and helping me along. When I said I want to become a Realtor he said me too! He has supported me in everything I have ever wanted to do.

I never hear this man complain about a thing. He just asks when and where and what can I do? 

His support with Edik has been amazing. Just helping me keep my sanity and stay grounded has meant the world to me. He has been willing to spend any amount of money to help him. He has fallen in love with Edik and is an amazing dad to him.

He is an adorer of his two grandsons, his heart is so beautiful  towards them, the delight he has in them is so heart warming. He thinks so highly of his sons. He cherishes every minute he has with them and wants to know them and be with them. 

Family is everything to him and he make it his priority. If we get a call from one of the kids and they want to do something or go somewhere he is ready willing an able, no matter how tired or short of notice it is. Which is so out of his character, but he will sacrifice for them.

Loving me can be difficult because I am neurotic, insecure and flighty and maybe possibly a little high maintenance. But he loves me perfectly. He finds me to be attractive and exactly what he likes. How did I luck out to be loved by such a magnificent man. I appreciate his sacrifices for me and our family. If there were ever a definitions of the perfect husband it would simply say; Brian Keyser.

December 16 Ordinary Extraordinary




December 16, 2011 Prompt:

Ordinary Extraordinary




What was one of your most extraordinary ordinary moments this year? Have you ever heard the expression "God is in the details?"
 

A year ago, we started seeing a herbalist. She is not an old, small shriveled up Chinese man but she is an experienced herbalist. Initially we were going to see her to have Edik treated. We figured with his poor nutrition and his bad living environment, it couldn't hurt, and maybe it would help his brain to heal. We had seen a friends daughter totally transformed by herbal medicine.


As she met with us and asked about our symptoms, it was mainly just foggy head and fatigue for me. Then she would ask do you get up to go to the bathroom? What time is that? If it was 2 am that would be your kidneys having issues and if it were 3 to 4 am it would be your liver. Brian has liver issues and I have had kidney issues all my life.


Herbalist, use to be in the same quack-a-gory as chiropractors. I thought it was just a way to separate a fool and their money. I was also hesitant to be included and involved in the Eastern belief system, because of my Christian belief system. I am not a fan of the ying and the yang. I want to honor my God and stay faithful to His teachings.


I decided, be it right or wrong, that if God created the heavens and the earth and everything in it and we are to subdue it. Then those whom He has gifted to understand the small plants and herbs of His creation must have been given that knowledge for the good of Gods creation. I listened to the explanations of Hayley our herbalist. It made sense to me about needing heat down in your belly so that the energy is there to digest and burn up waste. It made sense that our heads should be cooler than our hands and our feet, because then all the energy our body is producing is not just racing out our head and not going down to do the digesting and waste removal.


We take about a tablespoon of a special mixture of tiny herbs that trigger our organs to start working better. The greatest thing I have experienced is that my head feel hot fewer and fewer times. This has lifted a fog that had been over my brain, and the nervous feeling that had me feel I was always on the verge of passing out. It has given me more energy as well. I no longer spend all my time being emotionally afraid. 


Chinese medicine believes that the Kidneys hold the emotion of fear. I spent all my emotional time being afraid of this and that and everything in between, it is an exhausting way to live. I feel so much more aware of what is happening around me. My mind seems keen and clear. The clarity I have had when discussing a contract with a client has been so wonderful. I use to struggle to remember and put in order all the things that were important when discussing things with clients. Now it is all there bright and clear.


God is in the details. He has created plants that He intended for His children to eat, so they could be healthy. Our Western diet has corrupted Gods system. Now we spend our time trying to get it to work correctly again. 


The extraordinary ability to feel calm, clear headed, well organized mentally is an ordinary experience that I now have on a regular basis. Praise the Lord!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

December 15 Discovery


December 15, 2011 Prompt:

Discovery



What discovery did you make in 2011? What kind of impact did it have on how you view the world today?





This is something that I wrote for one of my writing assignment, I learned about Fetal Alcohol.

Struggling Through Life
Struggling, unaware through his life, the young boy tries to make his way. He wears a plane expression on his face. Neither interested, curious, distracted or angry, just plane. His dark brown eyes dance in their sockets not fully and smoothly tracking. But he is handsome, clean cut and has a sprinkle of acne to honestly confirm his age of 14 years.
His eyes do not really say anything. But if you ask his chiropractic Neurologist they say everything. The doctor can see the missing connections of his weak and confounded brain. Using a special pair of ridged square goggles that resemble enclosed jewelers magnifying glasses, with special video cameras focused inward towards his eyes, we can all see the crazy dance of his eyes.
The doctor spins him in an office chair, not fast and wild as a child might do but, quicker than a slow turn you might do if someone walked up behind you when you are seated at your desk. He stops the spinning boy who has his feet tucked up under him. He asks, “are you still spinning?” The boy answers, “yes.”  He is not. His eyes dance in an erratic fashion on the computer monitor. The left eye looks like it is following the line of a rapid heartbeat on a heart monitor. The right eye bounces from up and to the left to center repeatedly. This is showing us unhealthy saccades. Saccades are the movements of the eyes that allow it to take in a situation and develop it in the brain so that give understanding of their placement and of the situation. Healthy functioning brain activity would allow the eyes or the saccades to be even and level and smooth.
When a woman consumes alcohol during fetal development it is called prenatal alcohol exposure. This is possibly and arguably one of the worst exposures to a developing fetus. Exposure to drugs such as cocaine, heroin, marijuana will pass into the fetal blood supply leaving the child with the temporary high or dependency. We have all heard about the difficulty and trauma of babies being born as heroin or cocaine addicts, because of the pro-longed use by the mother. These infants have a tough start in life, they are born addicts, who will go through the physical withdrawals of these dependency drugs and have all the physical pain and internal trauma but they maybe free of the affects.
Fetuses exposed to alcohol have had the mitochondrial sheath damaged by the alcohol. Upon cell division a damaged cell will divide, repeatedly.  If something is ill formed and divides several times the wrong design is imbedded in the cells. The results are cell imperfection and then organ or system imperfection.
The brain is one of the first organs to be developing in the human construction and when there are imperfect cells compiling it due to a woman’s consumption of alcohol, damage is going to occur. The effects are called Fetal Alcohol Affected Disorder (FAAD) or Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (FAS). There is not a lot of differences in the two diagnosis other than FAAD is accompanied with facial abnormalities.
The facial abnormalities are wide set eyes, flat bridge of the nose between the eyes and a flat smooth upper lip. The facial anomalies occur during a fetus development on days 18 thru 21. They are tell tale signs of alcohol use by the mother. However, if the alcohol was consumed at any time before or after those days the effects would be less outwardly obvious and only detected in behavior and learning abilities and the admission of the mother’s prenatal use of alcohol. It is a social stigma to admit to alcohol use during pregnancy. Often times a child’s difficulties are not correctly labeled because of the mother’s unwillingness to confess to use. This results in ineffective ways of trying to help their children and the children being labeled with a variety of behavior issues.
The consumption of alcohol does not have to be great, it is a lot like Russian roulette, you put one bullet in a chamber and see if it blows your brains out when you put the gun to your head and pull the trigger. A woman has no idea which drinks if any will forever damage her fetus’s brain by leaving lesions or rather holes in the brain. But it could be a forever issue for her, the child and the family.
The lesions in the boy’s brain are in his left cerebellum and right frontal lobe. The cerebellum, controls body movement, emotion, it helps people pay attention and has to do with language. And this part of the brain is not talking to the frontal lobe, which is the executive function or the boss of the brain. It makes the decisions, it uses logic and it is our compass and allows us to understand space and time.
Imagine for a minute never knowing the proper boundary you should be to your friend vs your lover. Never knowing your proper position or placement in your surroundings. Imagine not being able to decide what is pleasurable to you, chocolate milk vs coffee and never being able to decide. Or maybe sitting in a room full of toys and not being able to decide what to play with so you do nothing. Imagine when you are asked a question, not being able to find the right combination of words to say to answer the questions. You cannot judge how long it’s going to take yourself or your friend to do something, when given an instruction you only hear every third word and then you cannot help yourself, you do the opposite of the instruction, because everything is jumbled in your mind and you have no way to logically sort it out. Imagine walking through life with a misfiring frontal lobe, a life without logic. The only thing you can do to make it through life is to learn the proper sequence or pattern of expected behaviors and when it is altered you are confused and confounded. You need an external brain to help you navigate your life.
This boy is our boy. He is a love; he can barely put a sentence together. We so want to know him, we so want him to know us. He pantomimes or mirrors normal, everything I have ever told him is parroted back to me, sometimes appropriately, like when we meet in the kitchen after we get ready for our days, “it is good morning, and did you sleep well?” I respond and regardless of the response his next inquiry is “did you have any dreams?” We had practiced those questions for 2 years before he could automatically provide them without coaching, but change the surroundings and I get nothing.
He is our prize from Russia. He is the answer to my calling. My calling came 16 years earlier while in Alaska. I fell in love with Russia and I was called by God to love the children and to one day adopt one. I had no idea it would take that long to prepare us/me for him. So a blind faith and calling did not lead me to research the ills of the Russian orphan’s plight. The ills of a country so lost in sorrow, and in the inability for most to care for themselves. In their sorrow, they resort to the abundant use of alcohol. It is a cultural standard to consume alcohol particularly Vodka, in social, family and business situations. It has been my experience if you do not participate it offends those around you. Our son was affected by his mother’s use of alcohol.
As we sit in the room with the 5th specialist we have looked to as we seek answers and methods to help our little boy, to be more like us, neurotypical, or normal brained. The doctor promises us that his methods have helped many Russian adoptees, because it is very typical for Russian adoptees to be affected by the alcohol consumption of their mothers. His methods seem like quackery, spin your son in a chair clock wise three times, three times a day.
We will try anything. The next visit, The doctor grabs those zit speckled cheeks and quickly twists his face from one shoulder to the other, watching his eyes. He sees a small improvement. I sit skeptically watching. The next exercise is looking at a diagonal line drawn on the paper with dots on it. He is to look from the bottom to the top then, let his eyes jump down from dot to dot. He must exercise his left arm because that side of his body is abnormally weak and unbalanced.
The ultimate treatment is the interactive metronome guaranteed to turn your misfiring brain into a sharp and well functioning organ. By keeping rhythm with the cow bell chiming in his headphone covered ears and clapping his censor clad hands in rhythm with the bells. This exercise is to create new neuro path ways in place of those that ran into holes previously. My fear was that it would just allow him to make bad decisions faster. The doctor promises that it will enable him to make decisions because his cerebellum will correctly fire to his frontal lobe.
It’s a lot of hope to hang on two cow bells clanging in his ears. But hope is all we have. We never dreamed we would be faced with forever being another human beings external brain. 10/2011

December 14 Home


December 14, 2011 Prompt:

Home is ...

When did you feel most at home this year: 


It always feels so good to go to Anchorage Alaska, it is home and will always be my heart is. I am so familiar with it. I can find my way around blind folded. I can still give directions using street names and businesses. 


The summer weather feels familiar, always in the 50's 60's so I can  wear a sweater or jacket. I can always count on the rain and the dark clouds over the mountains or the inlet.The views are so familiar, they feel so comfortable. I can pick out a memory from every mountain I can see. Every road I ride on and most businesses evoke some sort of recollection, I have a story for everything.


Friends and my family make me feels so at home. I could call any friend and just go hang out and enjoy their company and we would relate as though no time had passed between us. I can go to most well populated business or events and see at least 2 or 3 people I know, and I have not lived there in 16 years. Lori and Bruce are the most familiar and dearest friends. Getting together with my brothers and their families is like never having left them, loving them and learning about them is a continual endeavor, and most enjoyable.


Its a place that never changes for me, my memories and the good feelings remain in my mind and heart. 


My home in Oregon is only my home because of the peace that it brings because of the shelter from outside stress. I love my family being around me and joining with me, in the comfort of my personalized surroundings. I love everything I have done to my house to make it a home. I love the feelings of the colors and furniture and the pictures on the wall. Everything I have created and done to make it a place for my grandsons makes it feel even more like home. 


So I have two homes the one I left and long to be back at. And the one that I live in with the ones that I love.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

December 13 Best Gift


December 13, 2011 Prompt:

Best Gift


What was the best gift you gave yourself this year? 

I guess the secret would be out if I told what the best gift I gave myself is. Not sure I can divulge this. 

I often times think the best gifts I give myself is when I please someone else. It is a rare thing and something that I set myself up for failure in doing. But I still do it.

I always like to come up with a great gift for people I care about. I loved the fused glass plate I made for Amy, with the cut out of Africa and a heart where Ethiopia is. I loved giving Andy his IPad, I was thrilled to give him something that he really wanted. 

But taking care of myself, I think I do a pretty good job at that. Gifting myself massages this spring pretty darn good. Working out every morning is a wonderful gift. Choosing to be loved and to love others is a really good feeling as well.

But the best gift I gave me last year was going to the (I can not spell the word and can't find the correct spelling but here it is....Es-ta-ti-tion).  So when I went, I paid very close attention to what she was doing. Then I went out and bought all the stuff she used so I could do it at home. So now I have the acid peal that she used to remove age spots, and lines. I also have the special UV light she used to regenerate collagen. So probably more secret than I should have shared but I think its fun. I also do acid peals on Edik to try and clear up the acne. I just started doing this. 

If I had the freedom to be retrained in a career, I would choose caring for skin. I think it would be fun to help people feel better about themselves and to slow down the aging process. There, two of my big secrets are out.


December 12 12/12


December 12, 2011 Prompt:

12 in 12

Take today to talk about 12 things you would like to accomplish in 2012. 


1.Learn Russian
2.loose 12 lb.
3. Exercise 6 days a week for an hour
4.Take the dogs to the field 3X week
5. Go on a date once a week with my husband
6. Go to Italy
7. Go to Alaska
8. Go to Hawaii
9. Retire from Real Estate
10. Find some friends
11. Make sure every one I love hears it often
12. Finish the back yard

December 11 Best Meal


December 11, 2011 Prompt:

Best Meal

What is the best meal or best food that you have eaten all year? 



A story about my favorite sandwich;


Good food and a gracious cook can lead to being unceremoniously removed from a perfect living situation if you are not careful. One thoughtless comment about a fabulous dining creation is a dangerous utterance. When you are a freeloader who is clueless to all socially acceptable behavior and you are living among civilized people there is bound to be misunderstandings, and questionable behavior. Regardless of your unique inability to live with others, when a culinary sensation is being raved about by your host you should be in agreement.
Let me set the table so to speak. We heard of a  young man who attended OIT and  was doing an internship at ADEC the local largest employer here in our home town, of Newberg, Or.  He was from Greshem Or. and felt it would be a rather lengthy and costly commute to Newberg daily. He was looking for a place to stay free or cheap. He came from a rather large family and money was tight so, we were feeling generous, we had a nice home and room to spare so why not help out a kid who is trying to get a head, we would want someone to extend that generosity to our kids.
The agreement was he could live here for free if he would take care of our two, beautiful, like one of the  family, standard poodles, when we went to Spokane for  a week for our sons college graduation. Turns out he is afraid of the dogs, hates the dogs, refused to let them in the house, and could not bring himself to touch the raw chicken that they are fed. I brought in another house sitter for that week, much to our house guests surprise at a bonus cost to me of two hundred dollars.
We made numerous accommodations for him; cleared out space in the garage for his bike, finished a guest house in the back yard, which he promptly told me he would not have painted it the soft yellow color I had chosen, nor would he have put an entire wall of dry erase board in the structure. Ok opinions are good to have. We left our back door unlocked for him to gain access to our home. He used my sewing machines, no one is ever allowed to touch my sewing machines or my sewing scissors, but I graciously granted him permission. He was making jeans. He made jeans no bigger than a 34 inch waste but they were custom designed and he had a target market in mind. Skinny ass boys if you ask me but that did not matter to me. No one in our family has worn smaller than a 36 in the past 7 year.
There were other things, he wanted; an air conditioner for the guest house, no problem we can accommodate, if we were lucky we could find a narrow one that would fit the window. No such luck we would have to buy a free standing one. They run about $300. He was ok contributing half if we were to purchase a $100 unit, but he was not interested in contributing toward the expensive one. Mind you he is making $10 an hour working 40 hr a weeks and not paying any kind of room and board. You might think out of a sense of gratitude he might want to contribute. We chalk it up to immaturity; we are willing to accommodate him.
He loved to sing, he would bring out his guitar and sing beautifully, it was calming, much like when David played for King Saul, I truly enjoyed it during waking hours. But he also sang at the top of his lungs, at 7am as he was getting ready to leave for work, he had a beautiful voice, but it was 7 am. We politely asked him to take into consideration those still sleeping in the house. He came home at 11 pm and did the same vocalization; once again, we had to ask in to refrain from singing.

The La- Z- Boy chairs are focused directly in front of our big screen HD TV. These are “mom and dad’s” chairs, yes we have the best seats in the house, we own the house and we bought the chairs so why shouldn’t they be there? We ask you to respect that they are our chairs and not sit in them. This was the discussion that we had prior to his moving in. There are two couches and a plush glider rock in the same room as our chairs. Either of those sitting arrangement are comfortable and not ours, so make yourself comfortable, enjoy! But where did I find our house guest every time I came home? His size 32 plunked in my chair, with my purple La-Z-boy pulled forward 3 feet and a plate of food, that I had cooked earlier, placed in his lap. No one eats in my chair but me! But I was willing to tolerate I mean accommodate.
Food preparation was something I worked hard at, two months of being a contentious cook and preparing meals that were balanced per the government standards I was really getting in the groove. For the first time in years, there was a meal on the table, or served up buffet style every night. Always including a lean meat, two vegetables, a starch be it a grain or flour product, it was there. Several times our guest requested or hinted could you maybe make some more vegetables, you might want to add some spinach to this, or you might want to have some broccoli with that.  There was an aggressive attempt to make a fare that had plenty vegetables and was sumptuous and low calorie so as to enable that 32 inch waste to remain, who knows maybe we could benefit too, I was willing to accommodate.
But the meal in reference was a wonderful night of creation. Winco grocery in Tigard, sells a fantastic roasted garlic deli turkey. The rich savory flavor was something I had never experienced, so flavorful, distinct in all flavors, salty turkey, pepper, and garlic, so tender and juicy, it made your mouth water. They also sell a wonderful, firm, pink Italian roast beef deli meat. The mingling flavors of rosemary and basil is exciting. With the desire to be creative and blend the flavors of some of my favor things I created a sandwich that I felt was outstanding. Fresh tender Cibatta bread, sliced through the middle horizontally opened up to show its tender holy sides, so butter could be bathed over it, then pushed in the oven to warm up so it would be ready to receive the meat. Then there was a succulent layer of garlic turkey, an aromatic layer of Italian roast beef. Caprazia inspired alternation of thin sliced fresh vine ripe tomato, sliced fresh tender, water packed, mozzarella and fresh from the plant, basil leaves. Gently placing the side’s together completing the sandwich.
Our house guest was not home once again, at dinner time to receive my heart filled creation. So there was a selfish debate in my mind that then it slipped out my mouth. Should I cut this loaf in fourths or thirds? It looks and smelled so fresh and good, I was leaning to the thirds. But in an effort to accommodate, I cut it in fourths. We sat down in our respective chairs in front of the TV, and sunk our teeth into my creation. Spilling out of the corners of our mouths were raves of how incredible, delicious, amazing and wonderful this tasted. It truly was a new creation that would make a repeat visit to my kitchen. I had made a hit and that did not happen often.
Upon our guest late return, he sheepishly and rather effeminately asked if the remaining sandwich was for him. In my cheeriest June Cleaver voice I chimed, “yes it is, I think you are going to enjoy this, it is really out of this world”.  He made his plate and joined us, we were still raving about how amazing this sandwich tasted. A simple inquiry of his opinion on the sandwich invoked a sense of indignation in me. His response was, it is ok, but I think it needs some sort of crunch, I think I will add some cucumber.” He stood up to walk in to the kitchen.
This was the last straw, I had run out of accommodation. I could not imagine trying to please this ungrateful person for a minute longer. I told my husband he must go, tonight! The notice was given for him to be gone by 4pm Saturday. He had the nerve to ask if he could stay until Sunday evening. He had no idea what he had done, and I think that was pretty much the problem for the past 2 months and I could not stomach another minute of it.

Monday, December 12, 2011


December 10, 2011 Prompt:

High/Low

Today is a bit of a choose your own adventure: write (paint, draw, photograph, record, etc.) about your best experience this year.


Best experience that's easy; it's having a second grandchild come into my world. Having that adorable little man in our family is an incredibly wonderful event. The day I held Eli for the first time, when he was so tiny, the tiniest baby I had ever held, and to see him looking back at me with Peters little face was one of those once in a lifetime, full circle events. I saw that little face and thought how did my little baby, grow up and give me one of these! 


So the best events that took place this year were the times my grand children came to visit me and the times I got to visit them at their home. Any day with those two little jewels  in my life is heart warming.The day at the Oregon Zoo, sitting on the green lawn watching Mal play and enjoy his freedom, then the surprise arms wide open hug that he gave me was somehow the punctuation of knowing he loved me, now every hug I get from him seems to fill me up with that sense of being so innocently loved and it makes all the difficulties of everyday life feel meaningless.

Friday, December 9, 2011

December 9 Best Photo




December 9, 2011 Prompt:

Best Photo


Today, please post your best photo of the year. 
I really do not need to say anything.  I think I am the luckiest person in the world to be loved by Malachi. To have him run up to me and willingly with open arms hug me was such a big thrill for me. Grandkids are the best gift I have ever gotten. They thrill me more than anything I have ever experienced in my life. 

December 8 Catch Prase


December 8, 2011 Prompt:

Catch Phrase

What's your trademark phrase? 


"What's that mean?" I can hear myself saying that everyday. There are so many things that I don't understand. Often times they are associated with Edik because I get so confused by what he says and what he means or how is behavior translates. Or someone will do something and my response has to be "what's that mean?"


Trying to understand all the lives going on around me and associated with mine, is a complicated thing. Knowing where and how I fit in and if I even do fit in, leaves the words "what's that mean?" hanging in the air and circling my head.

December 6th Thelma and Louise


December 6, 2011 Prompt:

Thelma & Louise..

Who is the Thelma to your Louise? Who is your partner in crime? 


In Alaska my Thelma and Louise would have been Lori and Tracey without a doubt. But down here in Oregon for the last 16 years there has been no girl friend to enjoy the everyday events of life with. Feels kind of lonely. Brian is my Thelma, (because I am Beth Louise). He goes along with every hair brained idea I can come up with, he supports me as I jump head long over the cliff into a new project. He is sitting in the get away car waiting as I finish up some new deal I am working on. He is the strong support I need.


But if I look at my daily adventures Edik is the one by my side, my silent partner in crime, is is my accomplice. Safe by my side, watching for any mistake I may make. Tagging along on every misadventure in shopping and real estate. He would absolutely hate to be known as Thelma because anything girly just makes him squeamish! 

December 7 Achievement Unlocked


December 7, 2011 Prompt:

Achievement Unlocked

What goal did you set for yourself and achieve this year? 


A secret desire I had was to stop being depressed. I can't say that I did anything to stop that really but it did come about. I did not (said with a deep low commanding voice) "set a goal", but I don't typically set goals because I might not make them and then I would be disappointed. But after two years of being frustrated and not having any hope (which is the definition of depression) I decided to just lower my expectations, and not care anymore. Oddly enough it worked. The less I want things to be my way, which is not a selfish statement, because my way might just be to be more loving, or the be more loved, or to be more successful, or to be less irritable, those kinds of my ways, the happier I got when I let go of them. I have know this lesson for a long time, but I usually could pull myself up by my boot straps and stay happy, but it didn't work anymore. So reducing my expectations has been the pill I have taken like someone might take Prozac. The depression has lifted and the world is a bright and beautiful full place in my mind and heart again.

Monday, December 5, 2011

December 5 Theme song for the Year


Theme Song

If your life was a television show, what would its theme song be? What music would be cued at the start of the show or when you entered a scene?


I get up, I work out, I get dressed; carefully planning my make-up and ensemble for what ever I am doing for the day. Then when I walk out of the bedroom, I throw open the door and mouth the words "It's showtime". I think I do it for myself, to ready myself to take on the day. I really have no illusions on being some beauty or some all pulled together sophisticated women. But just making that statement seems to set an attitude that I can take what ever comes at me because I have done my best to look acceptable.


But in reality I think that the best theme song would be the Circus theme music, dat dat da da, dat dat da da da da... you know the musical number played on the Calliope when all the clowns are coming in and being silly. This music is more appropriate for the craziness that often accompanies my days. The bizarre conversations or exchanges between Edik and I, or the disjointed encounters with clients over paperwork, or showings, or maybe all the little interruptions of my day.So silly clown music probably better describes everday for me than would any sophisticated thoughts of having it all together.


But I could also claim the old crooner song, I Did It My Way. Not that I am being rebellious about anything. But parenting Edik is not text book, I don't think there is a manual for raising him. It requires a special approach that is direct, deliberate and consistent..So sometimes I just have to do things my way, because it works.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

December 4 What is your Super Power

Think about it for a moment: what have you learned that you can do better than anyone you know this year? What can you do that no one else can? 


I remember watching the TV show No Ordinary Hero, as I recall they received some unexpected super powers. They actually did not want them. I am not really a fan of having the power that I have. It is more of a burden than a benefit to me. It benefits the receiver of it but not necessarily in the way they would like.


Reading minds is my super power. I typically can tell when someone is lying. I can catch most people in the lie they may be telling, or just know when they are not being honest about what they are doing, saying, or thinking.


This super power is kind of a secret because if I reveal the times that I use it and who I use it on, it could lead to more evasion by the subjects, because they are close at hand.


My exclusive super power is being the only one who can take the time, to slowly, using words and ideas he understands to explain the meaning of everything that needs to be taught to Edik. To go over and over something maybe 100 or more times to help him grasp the idea or concept that he needs to take to heart. To take the time to make him stop, do "it" right, to start at the beginning and work through the event or the idea and make each and every correct decision to get the correct outcome. While doing this to decipher through what he understands and what he has no clue about even though he is agreeing to something or saying he does understand. I have the ability to know when he is confused or just being down right 14 year old boy stubborn. Which I would hope he would not exercise considering his inability to logically reason. And without that ability, imagine trying to teach someone something. It all boils down to my super power of consistency.


I am like the No Ordinary Family super hero's, I have superpowers, I am surprised by them and I am reluctant to use them, but when I do it is for good.



Saturday, December 3, 2011

December Day 3 Looking Back


#resound11 Prompt 03: Virtues

 What personal virtues we discovered in 2011.

What good have you done in 2011? Where do you really shine? What have you done that makes you proud of yourself?

I am a proud lover of ex-orphans! I love my son with my whole heart, as if he came from me, and I am giving him the best that I have, and the best that I can get for him. I am loving him even if he can't love back. Apart from God there is now way to do this, with God making a way there is no way to fail. 

I am a lover of Malachi, who I can't even imagine having been an orphan. It feels like he is the key that opened this grandma's heart. I am proud of how I wholeheartedly love both my grandsons they are the fizz in my heart that just keep the love bubbling out for them and everyone else, they have kind of re-stirred the love that had sunk to the bottom and now its bubbling out all over the place. Kind of hard to contain it!

But being a lover of orphans is easy so is that really something to be proud of myself, not sure about that, but I get to write it down, and be happy that I can.

I have made contact with the people who were robbed in Newberg and have reach out my hand to be their friends, and to help provide their kids with a special Christmas. I am proud of me for having the follow through to do that!

I am proud of me that  in business I remain honest, fair and work with integrity in all situations. Our office is collecting peanut butter for F.I.S.H. I pray for our leaders of our country, I committed to prayer and fasting this year. 

I have not been slothful and lazy but have been a hard honest worker of my life and my business. No slacking for me!